Love and Logic: We Really Left the House without Clothes

Last week, I was attempting to get my family to Lauren's Sporties for Shorties class at the Y on time.

On this particular day last week, we had 45 minutes to get everyone ready and drive to the class. My son was down for a nap. I told Lauren we would be leaving in 45 minutes and asked her to get dressed. I then jumped in the shower. When I was done with my shower, Lauren had not dressed herself so I gave Lauren the option whether she would like to pick out her clothes or would she like me to. She asked me to pick out her clothes. So I did. I laid them next to her and asked her to get dressed. Well, she was watching Dora and it was way more interesting.

I gave her an enforceable statement, "I keep Dora on for girls who get dressed." No luck. Blank stare at the dancing animation. I had to turn off Dora.

Then the tantrum erupted and my daughter spewed screams that could be heard down the block. "I want Dora!!!!!"

Time for an uh oh statement. I said, "Uh oh." and plopped her in her room."Do you need the door open or shut?"

"Not open! Not shut!," she screamed. The door went shut.  She attempted to open the door. The door went locked.

Through the door and through the screaming I calmly said, "You are welcome to come out once your clothes are on."  The screaming continued.

I finished getting ready myself. My son woke up from his nap. (There was a lot of screaming.) I plopped my son in the car. Then it was time for my daughter to get in the car.

I was thinking, please be dressed, please be dressed. Guess what, she wasn't dressed. Okay, I thought. Here we go. I picked her up, swooped up her clothes and walked her downstairs to the 45 degree car. She was still screaming. I laid her clothes next to her and buckled her in. She began to scream, "It's cold! It's cold!"

Once I started up the engine, I did turn the heat on. I'm not a mean mom. But even though my son and I were sweating in the 70 degree heat, my daughter was still screaming, "It's cold." She even managed to do a fake shiver.

Fifteen minutes later we arrived at the Y. I parked the car, unbuckled my daughter and calmly said, "Now would be a good time to get dressed."

The clothes were on in under a minute.

I debriefed with her after that. I have to make sure I always use an empathetic tone, but I've noticed I can break into a 'I told you so', tone. I asked her why we drove to the Y without her clothes on.

She said, "Cause I was screaming and I didn't put my clothes on."

"What do you think will happen next time I ask you to put your clothes on and you don't?"

"I go without my clothes on."

"Yes sweetie."

Ughh!  Thank goodness that's over and I didn't lose my cool!

Well yesterday I told Lauren we were going to the Y for her class again. Without even prompting she ran upstairs and said, "I have to get my clothes on!"